Billy of Mine (a eulogy for a friend)

You died so suddenly it sucked the wind

right out of me

you.

a myth of a man

you lied and made me think

that you would always be there to read my words

and smooth the pain a little with the understanding that you had

you were supposed to live on in the little things

that you taught me to love so well

the dust and the cracks

the leftovers

all the infinite ordinary moments that

I can hardly bear to face alone

 

you’re not in any of it

 

and even my memories of you are fading

 

 

Singing

Will you take me to sing the stars?

we will lie down

on the bosom of the earth

and forget ourselves there

we will  sing and gaze

until our souls rise up

until we can scarcely remember

that we have bodies down there

flesh and bone to bring us back

and make us human again

 

will you teach me the words?

I’m afraid I never learned them

I am shamefully mute

but I have the melody

pulsing in my heart

I think I could learn

if you helped just a little

 

will you hold my hands?

don’t let go

I sometimes get lost

in the mist

I need you to hold me tight

and guide me down

when the singing is done